So what is happening ?

Tonight I will sleep early, and tomorrow I hope to make use of every little bit of my time towards my goal. Uhmmm… What is my goal? I've been asked this morning what is my plan for the weekend and I …all I could utter was…”What day is it today?”  No, really…what am I doing?

I did a pretty good job messing up myself-my body fat has totally increased, and I have stopped performing commercially for about two months now (So how long does it take to form a habit? 3 months? Okey, I have one more month lol). It is a planned mess...relax I'm still in control...or am I? lol

As I've said earlier, this trip is for the family. I’m helping out settling small things. Recently, I've been doing house work etc. My brother runs small businesses which I’m looking forward to push and market once they are back from hongkong. My mom…my mom is quite something and we all need to talk to her. I've been cooking for my little brother and papa. I need to come up with an easy to follow menu for papa, so he can still make his food himself even if I’m not around. (We need to watch his diet) And as for my two little darling nieces…basically just to be there for them…take them around and stuff…hopefully be able to teach them how to sing before I go anywhere.

My goal here in the Philippines is to be there for the family and to pursue myself as an artist (spiritually and emotionally). After I have settled my family “things”, I would like to offer some more of my time for spiritual and community service. I’m going to accept some jobs perhaps at the middle of October just to keep my working “engine” running, and to add something more for my portfolio...I've accepted that the pay here will not be the same.

The long term goal is actually… to make one last pivotal self-reinvention (pursue my art, control my artistic temper, re-establish my singing – teaching profession, finish any course not related to arts just to prove a point, be a part of spiritual – community service, travel!, acquire “wife” skills, fix my slang lol,), this is the plan…before settling down and having kids (and so help me God). Yes, you've read it right! Family is a want! But my greatest fear as of the moment is…is not being the best-that-I-can-be before having kids…I wouldn't know what to tell them…how can I advise them to grow and pursue their most authentic self if I have not done it myself. 

I’m at the midst of creating an album. I’m lucky enough to have found two solo artists who are kind enough to help me out. And ….too…a crucial interview is coming…this is really really important to me.... will update.